dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Swine flu. Run for my life!
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
