Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
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