Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
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