I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
