yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
