Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
