she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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