I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Who put my cat in the fridge?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
