im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
