So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
