I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Randomize
