What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
