Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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