what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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