Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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