I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
