and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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