i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
