Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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