I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
