Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
