guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Randomize