they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
