Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
