Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
