I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
