Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
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