so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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