used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
