We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
It's blow job season.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize