I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
