I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize
