So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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