I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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