im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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