im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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