? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
