You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
