I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
