The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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