we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
