Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
