He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
