He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
