Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
