oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
