Duck Duck Cougar?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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