i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i was born a porn star she said
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
