whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
