I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
