Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
